Monday 20 August 2012

I've missed something here haven't I?

So I'm back from Spain and it's nice to have a decent internet connection again. I've been catching up with my corpmates and all the blogs I read, which wiped out a fair few hours while I fiddled on my two accounts. I decided to sort out all my "logistical" things before I got back into PvP, and started to download a new update.

Judging by the size of the download I had when I started the client, something fairly chunky was added, but I decided I couldn't be bothered about reading the patch notes until later. If it was earth-shaking, my corpmates would have mentioned it right?

Instead I reset all my market orders, which seemed to have survived my two week absence surprisingly well. I made a few more trips on Zendrak before logging onto Seraph and going out hunting. I logged into Pananan with ten people in Local, which was a little odd. Local usually maxes out at three or four. I undocked to have a poke around and stumbled into a cyno with several dreads and a carrier around it, right outside the station. Quietly wetting myself, I docked back up again and tinkered some more on my alt.

A few hours later, Pananan was all quiet again, so I headed back into LowSec. I roamed around in my shiny new HAM Drake, but it was too slow for me to find anyone. I returned to Pananan planning to do some exploration or ratting, when I saw a Procurer on D-Scan from the gate. I raised an eyebrow, and quickly narrowed him down to the top belt. I stifled laughter. This was too easy.

I threw my Drake into warp, and within seconds I was only 15km off the foolish Procurer. He started aligning out for warp, but it was too late. My disruptor had him nailed down and I started flinging HAMs into his face. He seemed to be taking far more hits than I would have expected for such a puny barge, with each volley only taking off maybe 5-15% of his shields. All of a sudden he flashed to red on my overview and I panicked. Was he a "bait barge" with a cyno? It would explain the ease at which I had found him. But no Supercarriers fell from the heavens to rain death upon me, so I frowned in confusion. His shields were still only slowly dropping, and I was worried my Drake was malfuctioning. Even a poorly skilled HAM Drake should 'splode a Mining Barge with no more than a sneeze. And then I stopped shooting.

Not out of any compassion mind. I was jammed.

I think I said something along the lines of "Hugmhgm?!" while gawping at the Procurer calmly aligning out to the station and warping away. I hadn't seen any ECM drones, and believe me, I made sure I had those bastards on my Overview. It turned out a few minutes later that the pilot had fitted a Multispecteral ECM instead of warp core stabs, on which he said

"Sethis Vokan > warp stabalisers aint worth shit"

Fair enough. I was pretty stunned as I warped away, surprised that an unbonused jam managed to save his ass. We chatted a bit in Local.


Seraph Minayin > the fudge...?
Sethis Vokan > lol
Seraph Minayin > shrug
Seraph Minayin > well played sir
Seraph Minayin > i admit i wasn't expecting to be jammed by a mining barge
Sethis Vokan > glad it worked
Seraph Minayin > lol
Sethis Vokan > warp stabalisers aint worth shit
Seraph Minayin > true
Seraph Minayin > people just bump you
Sethis Vokan > thought id try sumut new
Seraph Minayin > thought you were bait for a minute
Seraph Minayin > was very confused when you red boxed me
Seraph Minayin > didnt realise you had a jammer
Sethis Vokan > well glad it worked
Seraph Minayin > heh i bet

Sethis Vokan > that worked really well,
Sethis Vokan > am a bit chuffed



I then turned my attention to the patch notes, wondering how the hell a Mining Barge had tanked me long enough to survive several volleys of HAMs and fire off a jam cycle. I found the answer pretty much instantly in a fairly recent Dev-Blog.

- Procurer/Skiff: primarily made for self-defense. Better mining rate than the ORE frig (wait what frig?), good ore bay, but capable of having battleship-like EHP

Well bugger. Mining barges are no longer my whipping boys. Also how the hell did I miss this? Next time, I'll read the patch notes after every update. Then I might have realised what the hell was going on, since I was far more worried about the lack of decent damage from my Drake rather than how a Procurer was redboxing me with no guns, drones, webs, scrams or neuts. If I'd thought through the possibilities, it's possible I may have realised he was trying to jam me, and tried to keep bumping him out of alignment instead of cackling like a stereotypical villain while following him from a few kilometres away.

Anyway, well played Sethis. I hope to catch you another day! o7

Fly safe :)


* P.S. I apologise for the lack of screenshots in this post to break up the wall of text, but Overwolf has been acting up recently, and is refusing to take any screenshots of EVE that vaguely resemble what my screen is showing. *

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